whatsacactus | (no subject)

Mm.

[Neither of them do. Shiro just... did it differently. Different lives. He never had to deal with pain and loneliness like Keith did until he was much older. It didn't shape him. What happened on the Galra prison ship was different. He could rationalize that, as much as it was so outside his scope of experience. He adapted. Survived. Not just the fights, not just the torture, but being alone. That was maybe the hardest part. The other aliens were afraid of him, none of them ever got close to him willingly. And the Galra treated him less like a person and more like a thing, a beast of burden they happened to find entertaining. It was dehumanizing.

But Keith had grown up that way. Different without ever knowing why. He knows full-well that Keith would insist that Shiro's experience was worse, but it wasn't. His experiences hurt like hell, but they didn't change the course or core of who he was. Keith's did. Maybe he would have grown up to be a sweet, gentle kid. Maybe he would have followed in his father's footsteps to become a firefighter. Maybe he'd still be home, a billion miles away from this place, and have suffered none of this.

Shiro's hand tightens, just a little, against Keith's thigh.]

It's not half bad. Having time to ourselves.

[When he was younger, he had wanted to be like his father. Take up a position that let him help save people, save lives. Then he'd seen how that ended. He wiped the notion of being a public servant to save lives from his thoughts entirely. Not if it meant leaving other people alone like he was.

His father had never mentioned Krolia much, just that she'd had to leave shortly after he was born. He never knew what for until he'd found her on that recovery mission. This life he thinks is maybe not the best either. But this one, he has the people he loves fighting alongside him. They can look out for each other.

He looks down at Shiro's hand when it squeezes just minutely against his thigh, then back at the back of Shiro's head.]

...Does it worry you?

Does what worry me?

[There's.... kind of a lot...........]

Having time like this. Not fighting.

[His fingers spasm closed, though he doesn't dig in against Keith's skin, just lets the motion draw his hand into a fist a whisper away from it.]

It's hard not to think about all the things that could be going wrong. I'm trying to-- trust Black. And the others.

[Keith only hesitates when Shiro draws his hand to a fist.

Being here is worrying him. It's stressing Shiro out, not having any connection with the others. Being here, alone with him, is not the best place for Shiro in the end.

He carefully rests his hand over Shiro's fist. He has to swallow down the instinctive I'm sorry. The problem is it leaves him at a loss of what he can say.]

....We'll find a way to check on them.

[But it doesn't change that no matter how relaxed they are or how nice this is, being here with Keith like this is not where Shiro wants to be.]

I know they're all right.

[He says that much with conviction, at least, and then shifts so he's facing Keith, specifically so he can lean in and kiss his thigh.]

The harder part is trying to convince myself it's okay to have a vacation.

I guess... but we can still figure something out if you need to.

[While they may not be able to get to Black with the weather, he's convinced the longer they stay here that there has to be a communicator somewhere. It doesn't make sense Zarkon would cut himself off entirely from his people, even before the war started.

A shiver goes up his spine at the kiss, swallowing hard.]

What do you wanna do until then? [Once again setting the ball just at the edge of Shiro's court and running.]

[He laughs a bit, resting his forehead against Keith's thigh.]

Oh no you don't. The shower was my idea. Now it's your turn.

[He knows exactly what he's doing, and has a fairly good idea of where Keith's going to go with that. He surprises himself by being ready to agree to it.]

Oh, I thought that was a necessity and not a bonding exercise idea.

[There's a slight smugness there, mussing Shiro's hair some. He knows what he wants to do. But he knows they're both still hurting. Shiro's leg is still bad, his own shoulder is in bad shape still. He doesn't want to do too much or rush in a way that could hurt Shiro further.]

Maybe ... I don't know. Kind of liking just laying here..

[That is. Actually--

His eyes widen a little in surprise, and then he just. Huffs a soft laugh and pushes himself up on one hand to kiss Keith properly. Maybe he's learning. Maybe he just trusts Shiro's word.]

I'm all for more of this. [He noses at Keith's neck, over that bitemark he'd left there.] Being here with you is the only reason I can stand being away from the others.

[He grins into the kiss, a hand around Shiro to keep him close.]

I'm-- Thanks. [He means that, even if Shiro doesn't understand what he's being thanked for. It helps ease out some of the more unsettling thoughts that had started in the silence.]

[He knows. Keith's always been an open book, for those that cared to read it. Shiro breaks the kiss, pressing their foreheads together briefly and then pushes Keith down onto the bed so he can

absolutely

use him as a damn pillow.]

Edited (invasion of the clones) 2018-06-27 23:53 (UTC)

[He goes down with the urging, expecting... Not to be used as a pillow. He laughs at that, bubbling from deep in his chest and settles underneath him.

He can't bring himself to say the words so freely, but he thinks I love you so, so very hard and loudly in his thoughts.]

[Maybe Black's a bridge between them, but the sentiment echoes.

Shiro, however, is already busy catnapping against Keith, arm slung over him, head buried against his side. Shiro's halfway down the bed to make this work, one leg draped over Keith's. It's a possessive, protective posture.

But he still sleeps like the dead. Which, ha, ha, he has cause to know the intimate specifics of. This time when he wakes, it's to the little griffon creature perched on Keith's stomach insistently licking at his face.

Shiro makes a sort of blergh! sound and backs away from it instinctively, glancing up to see if Keith's awake before he actually says anything on purpose.]

[Keith had started dozing with him. It's a light sleep, nothing serious but enough to let his body and eyes rest. He woke a little bit later when the griffon landed close by and then climbed onto his chest. He didn't make any noise, just used his free hand to pet along its spine.

It's when it starts licking at Shiro's face that he has to contain the laughter, almost impossibly so when Shiro makes that noise and wakes up. It's cute.]

Sorry--But I think it wanted you awake.

[It flutters its little wings once with a happy trill. It absolutely wanted Shiro awake.]

[He has the grouchiest look on his face right now. Entirely put-out, like someone just took the last of his favourite food and flaunted their eating of it right in front of him.]

Does it mind?

[It's good-natured grumbling. He pets it anyway, and then flops back down beside Keith. He's feeling good. Oddly energetic. Maybe that's what enough sleep in a twenty-four hour period will do for you.]

I guess it's probably not a bad idea to get up and have something to eat.

[Gentler,]

How's your shoulder?

Probably.

[Keith carefully relocates the little griffon to the pillow as he shifts to get up. He had watched one of the bots bring their clothes back, folded and pressed and figures getting dressed is probably on the menu too.

He gets to work on that, stopping just at zipping the suit up when Shiro asks.]

...Still sore. But not as bad.

[Okay, the view while Keith gets himself suited up is-- spectacular, now that Shiro's decided to allow himself to enjoy it. He almost tells him just to stay naked, but maybe that's a little on the forward side. Instead, he rolls himself out of bed with energy and reaches for his own neatly folded pile of clothing.]

I want to take a look at it later. Make sure it's still healing all right.

Sure. [It's just a quick response over his shoulder, trying not to ogle Shiro too much while he's dressing. It's really hard not to watch though, the muscles in Shiro's back as he moves.

Christ.

Shiro could probably have any pick of anyone in the universe. Shadow gives a low rumble, coming to butt against his leg.]

Right, food for you too. Okay.

[He doesn't even bother with a shirt. There's enough time to be fully clothed around the others, now's not the time. But he does follow Keith out, barefoot back to the kitchen.

He's still not entirely hungry. He's aware of the physical sensation, but mentally convincing himself he should have food is an uphill struggle. At least he's no longer forgetting to breathe at inopportune moments. Long enough without it, turns out you lose the habit.

He shells a couple of the bugs while Keith does-- whatever it is he's going to do, and he bends down to feed them to Shadow.]

Sorry. Unless you want to go hunt one of the creatures outside, it's what we've got.

[Keith is working on getting some of the grain food he'd set aside earlier? Yesterday? He's lost track of time between sleeping and the unrelenting storm outside. He doesn't know if it's even the same day as when they landed. Maybe that was the point. Maybe that's why Black brought them here and left them on their own. To just... relax. Lose time like this.

It's almost sweet, if there wasn't an actual war going on.

Rest up first. Rest of the universe after.

He watches Shadow gamely nibble on the bug meat while he munches his own food. He tries not to think about his teeth - he'd felt fangs before, both during the fight and those few moments Shiro was cleaning his wounds - and they're gone now. But it doesn't mean they couldn't show up again. He self consciously closes his fists so he can't see his nails.]

She's good about eating whatever's there.

I see that.

[Sorry, pup, it wouldn't be his first choice either. Shadow gets a fond little pat, Shiro burying his hand in her ruff as she wolfs (ha) down the bugs he'd shelled out for her, and once it seems like she's satisfied he leaves her be. Between one heartbeat and the next she poofs outside, apparently enjoying the storm.

He watches her a moment as she cavorts out in the field, and then exhales. It's still beautiful, the weather inclement and wild, but he feels trapped. He doesn't want to start resenting the beauty.

He leans on the countertop next to Keith and opens his mouth, absolutely expecting him to offer out a spoonful of grainy mush.]

[Keith watches her outside, sort of chewing this bite over a bit. He doesn't think anything when Shiro comes to lean in close but... He blinks almost owlishly at Shiro waiting with his mouth open.]

What?

[keith pls.

Shiro does not even bother closing his mouth or actually articulating what he wants. He just raises his eyebrows. Looks at the food. Looks back at Keith. Come on, pal, you can figure this out.]